I want to tell you a story, one of my favorite celebrity encounter stories, but first I have to give you a little background, I have to tell you that I used to be a fly. When I started in stand up my style was very different than it is now, and Andy Kaufman was a major influence. I hid backstage during my set, having the emcee explain that I was suffering from stage fright and he’d have to bring the mic back to me. Then I’d do mime getting laughs with silence and an empty stage. I’d do celebrity impressions that were just me playing clips of said celebrities. It was all wonderfully weird and worlds away from the storytelling comedian I ended up being. Maybe someday I’ll go back to being a weirdo.
The Kaufman influence was obvious, and frequently pointed out by my peers but a lesser recognized influence, who still effects the way I host, and the way I encourage others to host, is Chuck Barris, creator and host of The Gong Show. Barris’ super positive introductions, and his energy on stage made him the perfect host. And still another big influence on my younger comic self was Chuck Barris nemesis and foil, The Unknown Comic. As a kid I loved the great bag headed one. “Chucky baby, you ever make love to your wife in the shower? You should. She loves it!” I memorized his jokes and would do them for my friends. The first man to land on the sun was a favorite, hopping around like my feet were burning, “Ow, oh, ouch.”
One night while suffering from insomnia, where most good ideas come from, I hit on an idea for a very Unknown Comic inspired character, Francois Fly. I’d put strainers on my head and I wrote a whole series of fly based jokes. Francois’ movements, punctuating jokes by cleaning his eyes, or rubbing one foot on the back of his opposite leg, really drove it home and the bit got me my first professional week at a club. Eventually it also got me a gig working with another childhood hero, Dr. Demento, and I once performed as Francois from a garbage dumpster in San Francisco. When I recruited some friends to help me launch a summer midnight movie series called The Trash Film Orgy, I decided Francois Fly would be the perfect host.
And that brings us to the celebrity encounter. The great Bruce Campbell, star of the Evil Dead films, was doing a book tour with his memoir collection If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor. We teamed up with a local bookstore and arranged to screen Evil Dead II at Sacramento’s beautiful historic movie house, The Crest Theatre. I would interview Campbell and host a Q and A before the show. I had someone else dress up as Francois and walk behind us during the interview, so that it couldn’t be said that we were never seen in the same place at the same time. The highlight of the evening for me was when Bruce Campbell picked me up, and body slammed me onto the stage. The crowd went wild. When we got back to the dressing room I said, “Oh man, that was great. If you would’ve told me you were gonna do that I could’ve sold it more.” and he said, “I thought about that, but I decided it would be more fun if you were surprised.”
But that isn’t the story I came here to share today. Now that you have all the necessary backstory, let me tell you about the worst heckler put down line of my career. The Trash Film Orgy crowd was notorious for heckling. The hecklers would heckle the other hecklers when their heckling wasn’t up to par. When someone heckled me as I interviewed Bruce Campbell I stepped forward proudly and said, “Oh, a heckler. Listen buddy, hecklers like you disgust even me, and I’m a known shit eater!” It was then that I remembered that on this occasion I was not dressed as a fly, and I just dealt with a heckler by telling a crowd of hundreds that I was a shit eater. Of course the line worked. The heckler was baffled into submission. I heard a few loud laughs in the mostly confused theater, my comedian friends knowing exactly what happened were howling with laughter. I continued my interview.
I love that you "baffled them into submission." That's pretty much my go to. Wait a minute. I'm commenting on this Substack! It's happening! I'M ALLOWED TO COMMENT!!!!!!
dear keith,
this is a very funny story.
thank you for sharing it!
love
myq